“You have really good flexibility. Your practice has a lot of potential”
I got this comment after a Bikram class I accidentally enrolled myself in.
The teacher was a nice, but she never asked if I had any injuries. When I was reprimanded for not “locking out my knee” (which she repeated upwards of 20 times) I had to tell her I was recovering from a knee dislocation and that movement was not available to me.
When I couldn’t put my legs into deep flexion and lay with my back against the floor while sitting on my knees, instead of offering modifications, she advised me to “just go further” or else my practice won’t actually show the proper benefits.
She then went on to say that this style of yoga and fixture of poses is the ONLY style in the world that gives you energy instead of taking energy away from you.
This is when I wish I had the gusto to walk out of class, because it is an absurd claim to site.
For those who are not familiar with Bikram, it is a series of 26 poses. The same 26 in the same sequence every single class. You are told when you can and cannot drink water. The “relaxed” position on the ground is keeping your eyes open, legs closed, and arms by your side.
If you couldn’t tell, I personally disagree with Bikram.
In the classes I have taken, the commentary has been anything but kind and my body is forced into poses instead of working towards what feels natural in MY body.
Immediately after leaving the class, I called my husband to laugh about my experience.
“Thank GOD I have found my confidence or else that class would have turned me away from yoga for good.”
I know this teacher wasn’t trying to make me feel bad. She was trained in a VERY specific style, and she knew her stuff when teaching it.
Her delivery, claims, and comments on my specific body is what made the class cringey.
Believe it or not, this isn’t just a slam piece about Bikram.
Her words meant something to me and it got me thinking.
How often have we said something that upset the person we talked to? I know I have. Not my best quality, but I can have a slippery tongue at times. (I'm working on it, okay?!)
Now after this happens, we tend to feel bad, apologize, take a deep look into our psyche to adjust so it doesn’t happen again.
How often do we say things to OURSELVES that we may not say to a person standing in front of us?
Guilty as charged. Life sentence. No parole.
I do it and I’m sure you do it too.
As a teacher some of the comments that were made to me were just baffling, but when I really sat down and thought about it… I have made MUCH worse to myself.
I even did it during the class! Maybe you would say that she was shifting my perspective with her words, but it started long before she began speaking.
I was comparing myself to the other women in the class, looking at the lines my bra was making on my body, fixating on the zits on my face after a long day of travel and a sleepless night. I was putting myself down before she even entered the room. I didn’t notice this until she started commenting on my practice and I was taken aback. Then I realized... I was no better to myself.
One thing in my life I am extremely confident in is my yoga practice. I have spent years honing it, and I thoroughly enjoy it. So when she made a comment on my practice and its potential, I could laugh it off.
If that comment had been geared towards my skin routine, it may have been a bit different. But I was the one making harsh comments towards my outward appearance, and I thought nothing of it.
Our thoughts become our reality.
Her bringing my attention to my own consciousness was a way for me to shift back into the present and take a long hard look at how I treat myself. Negative conversations within yourself will not help you.
There is a difference between looking at areas of your life you want to do better within, and just blatantly tearing yourself down.
So next time you start speaking down, ask yourself… would I say this to a person I just met? A friend? A loved one?
We can’t always change the way we think at the drop of a hat, but we can sit back, notice, analyze, and adjust. When we become aware of our thoughts, we can start shifting our perspective and upleveling our life.
Remember, the person most sick of you IS YOU. We are stuck with ourselves, so we may as well make it a kind place to be. Stop being so mean to yourself! You’re doing the best you can with what you got.
And remember, small steps climb big mountains.
It’s one day at a time, one step at a time, one thought at a time.
Lots of love,
Tia
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